Archive — FUXED

2026

1985

1985 · 2026-08-06T11:00:00Z

Nissan Retires 'Datsun,' the Name America Knew, and Spends a Reported Half-Billion Teaching Everyone the New One

1985 · 2026-08-05T12:00:00Z

Coca-Cola Improves a Drink Nobody Asked to Be Improved; Un-Improves It 79 Days Later

1976

Nation Vaccinated Against Pandemic That Never Shows; Pandemic Sends No Apology

1976

President Declares Inflation Illegal; Inflation Keeps Operating Without a License

1976

City Saves Doomed Neighborhood by Demolishing It, Its Residents, and the Concept of Neighborhoods

1926

Uncle Sam Poisons the Nation's Hooch to Teach Drinkers a Lesson; Drinkers Keep Drinking

1926

Sunshine State Sells Same Swamp Forty Times; Hurricane Arrives to Demand a Refund

1926

State Bans Evolution to Protect Children; Treats Children to Front-Row Seat at Circus Instead

1876

1876 · 2026-08-06T15:00:00Z

Government Cures Cheap Money by Making Money Scarce; Farmers Decline to Send Thanks

1826

Nation Holds Election; Congress Selects Different Winner to Save Everyone the Trouble

1826

Congress Permanently Settles Slavery Question by Drawing Line, Vowing Never to Look at It Again

1826

Bank Founded to Steady the Economy Steadies It Directly Into a Ditch

1776

1776 · 2026-08-06T13:00:00Z

On the Continental Bills of Credit, and Their Improvement Into Worthlessness

1776

Britain won the continent, then forbade anyone from living on it

1776

Parliament made tea cheaper and received a riot in return

1776

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2026

Reflecting Pool Renovated, Refilled, Then Promptly Turned Green

The Fly War Was Won. Then We Closed the Factory.

The Deal Was Working. We Fixed It Into a War.

1985

Nissan Retires 'Datsun,' the Name America Knew, and Spends a Reported Half-Billion Teaching Everyone the New One

Coca-Cola Improves a Drink Nobody Asked to Be Improved; Un-Improves It 79 Days Later

1976

Nation Vaccinated Against Pandemic That Never Shows; Pandemic Sends No Apology

President Declares Inflation Illegal; Inflation Keeps Operating Without a License

City Saves Doomed Neighborhood by Demolishing It, Its Residents, and the Concept of Neighborhoods

1926

Uncle Sam Poisons the Nation's Hooch to Teach Drinkers a Lesson; Drinkers Keep Drinking

Sunshine State Sells Same Swamp Forty Times; Hurricane Arrives to Demand a Refund

State Bans Evolution to Protect Children; Treats Children to Front-Row Seat at Circus Instead

1876

Congress Tidies Up the Mint and, in the Doing, Quietly Demonetizes Silver

Disputed Election Resolved by Awarding Presidency to the Man Who Lost It

Army Sent to Force Sioux Onto Reservation Locates Sioux, Regrets It Immediately

Government Cures Cheap Money by Making Money Scarce; Farmers Decline to Send Thanks

1826

Nation Holds Election; Congress Selects Different Winner to Save Everyone the Trouble

Congress Permanently Settles Slavery Question by Drawing Line, Vowing Never to Look at It Again

Bank Founded to Steady the Economy Steadies It Directly Into a Ditch

1776

On the Continental Bills of Credit, and Their Improvement Into Worthlessness

Britain won the continent, then forbade anyone from living on it

Parliament made tea cheaper and received a riot in return

Parliament fixes one unruly harbour; receives one revolution